you dont realize what its like to be your age until afterwards. like when you see a kid who's about 10 you think about how cool it was back then, but when you're 10 you have no idea just how much fun you are really having. you think about being older, getting to do "cooler" things. you appreciate things alot more when they aren't there. this is true not just about age, but about most things in general. it's really important to try to cherish and live in the moment. life can change in a second. i always imagine cars crashing into me and i think my life would do a complete 360 if i just turned the wheel on my car THIS way. soo freakin weird. im lucky im not in any physical pain. i take it for granted. you never know what could happen. i suppose i should stop being so hard on myself. being at war with ur own mind is not a healthy thing. ironically enough, the fortune cookie i received tonite ties in with this theme: "Strong and bitter words indicate a weak cause". This is quite true in more ways than one. i think one of the goals in my life should be to become at peace and content with my own mind and body. it's a struggle for many, way too many. it's time to stop, take a deep breath, look in the mirror and say to the person looking back......"You are wonderful, special, smart, beautiful, and i love you"...only then can u truly give love back to others who u hold close in your heart. goodnitexxx